LOVE BBQ Season !

Another beautiful day behind us, as I look forward to more in the days ahead.

What did I do today?  the usual make the bed, do up the dishes .... then the unusual as I cleaned one side of the patio doors today.  Why only one side? well the sun came around to that side of the house and I find it easier to clean windows without direct sun on them.  Do not know why, but do know this works for me.  Will try to get at it first thing tomorrow morning before the Sun moves into the South, as really one sparkly patio door window will just not do.

This afternoon I opted not to stay in to do housework, meaning wash the kitchen floor (which is in dire need of a washing), but took myself outside and cut the lawn.

This time of Year is one of my favourites with everything fresh and green.

Oops I almost forgot, I also got out for a walk with my friend, Sharon, this afternoon.  I walked a total of 11015 steps so far today which is the equivalent to 7.3 km (4.53 miles).  I am pretty amazed that going out walking is not as strenuous to me as it was a couple of months ago, especially since I really haven't been out walking much the past 3 weeks.  I am happy Sharon is back from her holiday so I have someone to go walking with on a more regular basis.  Thanks Sharon !

My bff, Vicki, and her hubby, are coming up with their RV this weekend.  Vicki and I usually don't have any problems keeping ourselves busy when they come up.  We are going to go to the Wiarton Farmer's Market tomorrow, and if there are any Yard Sales Saturday I am certain we will make our presence known at them as well.  Fingers crossed the weather is as lovely as it was today.

Dinner was delish again tonight.  I LOVE BBQ Season !!!!  Rob made himself a couple of beef burgers, and he made me a Turkey Burger.  Burgers and salad most certainly hit the spot.

I haven't gotten back to the point of cooking and baking like I used to yet.  First of all I am still not feeling like it, and secondly I have been very strict on sticking to my 1200-1400 calorie a day diet.  Gaining 60 lbs from medications I had been taking last year, has not been as easy to come off as it was going on, so I have been very diligent in sticking to my daily calorie intake .... it is coming off slow but steady.  I was happy this morning as I got into a pair of jeans that would not have fit me a couple of weeks ago.  Yay me !!!

Tomorrow I have my bi-weekly appointment with my Doctor.  I am pretty certain he will be increasing my medication.  I have been very happy with how I have been feeling on the new meds, with really no side effects this time around, other then I have still been having anxiety attacks, but still a much better mood.  Plus I have been doing more then what I had been two weeks ago !!!!

Fortunately it not being as cold today as it had been yesterday, we did not have to fire up the wood stove this morning, and not either this evening.  It sure has been an up and down Spring, has it not?

This is all she wrote this day, Just North of Wiarton & South of the Checkerboard.

A Happy Mail Day

I really hate wishing my Life away, but I am happy, and relieved, I have gotten through the last 24 hours....

My yesterday, which was going along pretty good up until after I had posted my blog post when I then had received a phone call that sent me topsy turvy and right back into my roller coaster mode.

Last night I barely slept as anxiety had me in its grips once again.

Fortunately by 9 am this morning I had some news which got me somewhat levelled out again.  Loosing a night's sleep, feeling anxious and stressed had left me for exhaustion this day.

It just happened I had an appointment with my counsellor today.  Truly an hour session didn't go far enough, but I did gain some insight in what emotions I had been dealing with those last 24 hours.  It is difficult to change the mould after so many years of ones thought process being one way.

My support system, girlfriends, Vicki and Shannon, thankfully were only a phone call or a message away for me today.  Thanks girls xxx !

After I had been a bit evened out this morning I did manage to get the dining room floor vacuumed and washed (much needed).  This evening? Rob grilled us a perfect Striploin Steak dinner that was to die for.  I am very blessed to have, not only a supportive husband, but one that is an excellent BBQer (new word).

So much for washing the floors, as it had rained last night resulting in wet muddy feets of a couple of four legged furbabies .....

Bandit not only had muddy feet, he also had a bit of an attitude with his "smirk", or as one of our puppy owners called it, an "aussietude" !

I received some Happy Mail in today's post.  I have had a Facebook friend from Ireland for the past eight years or so who was so kind to post me ....

.... these lovely magnets of the largest river in Ireland, the River Shannon, which runs outside of where he lives, and an Irish Wolfhound.  More on the River Shannon may be found HERE.  Thanks Dave, I so very much appreciated getting happy mail from you. (don't know if he reads my blog but wanted to make certain my thank yous are all in order).

In the mail I had also received a note from my blogger friend, Lynn.  Lynn writes under her foodie blog name, Turnips 2 Tangerines.  You may drop into Lynn's blog by *clicking* HERE.  Thanks Lynn! xx

I LOVE HAPPY MAIL ! don't you?

I have been rambling and babbling this whole post.  I am tired.  This is how I will leave it this day while I head towards an evening hopefully with a fitful night's sleep for me, Just North of Wiarton & South of the Checkerboard.

Two Moons

Here I find myself at the beginning of a new week already ..... yes, we all know how fast time can fly by us, do we not?

Last week we had to head down to the City of London as Rob had a consultation with a back specialist which we have been waiting for the appointment since last year.  It sure takes time to get into some of these specialist that is for sure.  I had been quite impressed that we didn't have to wait too long past our 11 am appointment, which was a real bonus (especially when the parking meter is ticking outside; not cheap to park at these big hospitals).

We both liked the specialist, whose name I can't pronounce unless I hear it said first.  The results are for Rob to go back in a couple of weeks, when we get a call with another appointment, to have needles put in his vertebrae.  It was also discussed should the pain blockers not work then they would burn the nerves.  It all sounds a little scary, or more so painful, but if it stops the awful daily pain he is in then so be it.

The rest of the week I barely remember what I did or didn't do, which is really a good reason why I should begin blogging again daily so I do remember ....

Saturday I went to a 20 mile Yard Sale with my friend, BJ.  With all the starting and stopping along the way that took up the whole morning !  I was happy to get some relatively current DVD movies for Rob for $1 each, which made me pleased as punch.  Rob had to go to Toronto this day, and wasn't back until well after dinner time, so a friend and I went downtown to the Wiarton Inn for some dinner.

Sunday turned out to be a fairly nice day, considering we had tons of rain come our way throughout the night before.

My stamina isn't what it should be since I haven't been very active the past Year, but I still managed to clear out a very small section of the front flower bed.  Look at all that was pulled out of that very small section and what still has to be done !  

I seriously thought I would just mow the gardens in, but I used to really enjoy them so I thought I would try to make a go of them.  I broke down last week and asked two friends if they would come out to help me weed it (they both said yes, and I am hoping they don't regret that once they see what a mess it is).  The sad part was I hadn't even touched them last year .... and anyone who knows me would know my flowerbeds barely had a weed in them when I was on my "high" in life.

A few people on Facebook have been doing "spatchcock" chicken, so yesterday I thought Rob and I would also give it a go.

Before and after photos of our "spatchcock" chicken.  Should you be interested in trying this out yourself just *click* HERE for a video on it.

Today they were calling for, and still are, 40% chance of  Thunderstorms.  So far the sky has been full of sunshine and white fluffy clouds with no sign of rain.  We will see.

I had a friend call me this morning to tell me to watch tonight's sky for two moons.  Really two moons? that is because she took the time today and washed her floors !!!  Well let me tell you, you best be watching the sky tonight for four moons, cause I washed my hallway and living room floors today !!!  I must be feeling better with the new medication cause I would be scared to tell anyone when the last time was that I had washed my floors.  Awful to say, but that is exactly how sick I have been over the past year and a half or so.  

Yes life most certainly got out of hand on me while I was sick and powerless.  I have to stop being anxious and realize it took that long to get in such a disarray that it won't change back up to the way it was overnight.  Hopefully, with the help of the new medications, I can get over my anxiety attacks and get a little bit more done each day .... the depression has slowly started to lift, so this has been very positive too.

Encouraging news this morning when I got on the bathroom scales, I was down another pound !  With 60 pounds put on from all the different meds I have been on the past year, being back down 12 pounds has been very enlightening.

Thank for for sharing my journey with me, Just North of Wiarton & South of the Checkerboard.

I Am Stuck

Yes I am stuck, stuck within a mind that is not being convinced to feel energy, motivation, passion, nor pleasures.  It has been a long journey and I have been very tired of feeling, or "not" feeling, any enjoyment for living.  Life is way too short to be like this, however I have been powerless, despite my efforts, too feel much different at the present time.

Medical update:  I was back at the psychiatrist this past week, who put me on another Bipolar medication since I was weaned off the Latuda, which did not work for me.  Hopefully this new medication, Lamotrigine, will work for me.  I am praying my hardest it will release me from this misery I have been dealing with for months on end.

After reading some reviews on the Lamotrigine I have been feeling hopeful it will be the "right" medication for me.   *Click* HERE to read the reviews I had came across through googling.  Fingers crossed big time and ALL PRAYERS WELCOME !!!

How have I been feeling for the past few months? debilitated in pretty every which way imagined.  I fear people will get sick of me as it is the same old same old with me, but truly if I could change the depression I have had for the past couple of years it would have been done in a blink of an eye !!!  and never mind the lack of self esteem that goes along with it ! On the most part I suffer in silence and die a million deaths inside some days when I have had terrible thoughts about what "other people" think of me ..... truly a vicious circle in my mind and what has been causing me lately to avoid going out to any events/functions.  I have even stopped dropping in on a friend who I used to frequently drop in on a couple times a week.

I spent the whole of  this past Winter mostly sitting on the couch allowing the days pass on by without me .... really what was there to blog about? making my bed, doing the dishes, then spending the day sitting on the couch?  I thought not, so I didn't.

I have had tons of well meaning advice over the months, and wonderful support from a few key people in my life (not to mention how wonderful, considering the circumstances, how my husband has been).  I surely appreciate all the support I have gotten and still get, however it is something in my "head" that needs correcting.  Trust me I do try very hard to "push" myself, but you know if the feelings aren't there it just doesn't happen.  I guess what I really want to say is all the best advice and concern coming my way hasn't gone on deaf ears, just something I am not capable to always put in motion at this time in my Life.

What more do I want to say? really I don't think there is much more to say at this moment in my Life, other then I will be back to blog here and there, Just North of Wiarton & South of the Checkerboard.

Happy Easter !

Happy Easter 2016.  

It will be a quiet Easter for Rob and myself this Year.  We had been down to see the grandchildren a couple of weeks ago and given them Easter treats from us then.

The Sun is out in full force so far this morning, but not yet sure what the day ahead will bring for Rob & I.  I am hoping my friend, Sharon, and I will get out for our walk, and maybe Sunday Easter drive might be the order of the day.

Our BBQ isn't hooked up yet since we had a new propane provider install propane tanks, however I am certain I will have good success cooking the steaks I had taken out of the freezer, under the broiler in the oven.  Fresh asparagus, broiled steak, and baked potato for our Easter Dinner.

This past week I enjoyed another birthday, last Friday, and also was up to a photo challenge given to me by a couple of Facebook friends.  The challenge was to post 7 days of nature photos.

These are three of the photos I had taken over the past couple of years which I had posted for the challenge.  I particularly liked the photo of the Goose I had taken.

The 7th day of the challenge I had posted this amazing photo my Rob had taken the morning after the ice storm we had this past Thursday evening.  He really caught the glory of the ice and sunshine, did he not?

I had a couple of pretty bad days this past week, however made it though them to be feeling actually pretty good so far this day.

Hoping everyone is enjoying their Easter Sunday, and that the sunshine is shining down on you wherever you might be.

Oh yes, the "Terrific Three" puppies are all doing well.  Their eyes have recently just opened, so you know "trouble" will surely follow.  Portia is doing well, and Bandit .....

.... he is a proud father as well.

This is all she wrote this day, Just North of Wiarton & South of the Checkerboard.

It's Been Awhile

It's been awhile since my last blog post.  I still am not up to snuff with even thinking about doing a daily blog post, however will do one when the spirit moves me.  Today my spirit has been moved.

Should anyone follow the Facebook page of our Checkerboard Aussies, they would have known by now Portia had her puppies last Friday.  I am pleased to introduce ....

The "Terrific Three" ...... one Blue Merle Male, and two Red Tri Females.

I hate to disappoint anyone, however all three of the "Terrific Three" have been sold. Two were sold before they were born, and the third one sold last night.  Just think in another week their eyes will be open, and in three weeks time I will be feeding them solid foods ..... totally amazing isn't it, and in 8 weeks they will all be gone to their new homes at the end of April.  Time flies by .....

Saturday my Auntie Gladys came up for a visit.  We met for a light lunch at the local Subway then headed up to Gateway Haven to have a bit of a visit with my Mother.

Aunt Gladys had brought along a family photo she was showing Mom.

Since this coming Friday is my birthday, Auntie had brought me along a gift of a rose.

In the "spirit" of St. Paddy's Day, this rose is a very pale green.  Beautiful is it not?  Just think I almost could have been a Patty .....

Sunday Rob had a day off, so we took advantage by driving down to the Costco in Kitchener.  Since we were so close, we also dropped around to see the grandchildren.  It makes for a long day going down and back, however well worth seeing the kids when we do so.

Last Fall we had bought flooring and paint for our bedroom, however not had time to get around doing anything with it.  Today we decided to start decluttering our bedroom to get going on things.

Six bags later !!! and a whole bunch of empty hangers, I would say we made quite a good dent on it today !!!

There is still plenty to do, but at least it was a good start, and you have to start somewhere to get going where you want to be.

Also today I began my first scheduled appointment with Trauma counselling.  Let's just leave it that I didn't have a very good afternoon, and there had been many tears shed.  I was very grateful that the counsellor is very educated on Bi-polar, and I did actually gain some further information on it.

Today I came away with knowing I have survived 40 years or so having Bi-Polar without harm to myself or others, having no diagnosis until recently.  The counsellor pointed out how much strength I have had to survive all those years with what I had to go through.

As I said, lots of tears, but again, it is a beginning, and I have begun the struggle of hopeful healing.

I can't write anymore about it right now as I find it too emotional and difficult.  Maybe another time.

This is all she wrote this day, Just North of Wiarton & South of the Checkerboard.

Difficult Getting Things Done

 Today has not been too bad of a day as I did manage to get a few things done, as some days I find it to be difficult getting things done.

As anyone can tell by these photos it is clear that the help I have around here just "ain't cut out" to what it should be .....

This morning I went for a walk with my friend, Sharon, nice and early about 10 am..  I thought maybe out walking so early I would be tired to get anything else done, but I surprised myself.

Sunday we had been down to the Southampton Market, as I had decided we needed to replace our kitchen cabinet handles as the old brass ones had seen their day.  Rob had started replacing them yesterday so I took it upon myself to change a couple today.  What do you think? much better then the old brass ones?

It sure isn't cheap to upgrade anything now a days.  For each handle it was a cost of $3.95.  We had needed 32 of them.  I have yet to decide whether or not we should change up the hinges or not.  Time will tell once I discuss it with Rob.

I started going through some of the loose recipes I have managed to acquire over the years.  I ended up getting too overwhelmed and stuck them all into a cupboard.  Clearly this will have to be left for a day I have more patience and less other more important stuff to do.  I am undecided whether or not just to get rid of most of my recipes, and just "google" from the computer when I need something, or to organize and keep all my old recipes.  Decisions, decisions ...... there are some days I just hate making decisions, how about you?

One thing this week I had no problem making a decision about was watching The Voice !!!  a new episode began Monday night much to my delight.  If only all my decisions were so easy to make.

I had a friend give me a Facebook challenge last week to post a daily Nature photo for 7 days.  I usually "jump" at such a challenge, but to be quite honest I am still not back to "myself", and haven't stepped up to the plate for the challenge as of yet.  Yes I can not believe I have barely had my new camera in hand.  I hope this changes soon, as much as I hope I start feeling more better.

Portia is due to have her litter of pups (hopefully not just one this time around) on the 9th of this Month.  I have to get some ambition up real soon and get the whelping pen down in the basement cleaned up and ready for her.  This better be happening in the next day or two, or "Houston we are going to have a problem".

I am a little more excited about this upcoming litter then the last litter we had.  This must be a sign I am improving somewhat.  This is a good thing.

I hear the weather is suppose to see double digit figures next week ????  this will be nice considering this last dump of snow we just had.  This Winter has been quite the roller coaster with temperatures, has it not?  I am actually thinking I will be well enough to consider my flower beds this Summer, so that in itself is pretty exciting, with me hoping the temperatures hold true then.

I am over my "break" now, thinking it might be a good plan to get back to some more puttering in my kitchen with this and that while the mood is still present ..... we have to talk ourselves into these moods some days do we not?  The next "big" chore I want to get at is the linen closet and the cupboards in the bathroom ..... YIKES ! I know I should be scared, but yes somebody has to do the dirty work, and I am beginning to realize my name has been attached to it.

That is all she wrote this day, Just North of Wiarton & South of the Checkerboard.